During the week of April 10, 2013, marketing research firm Harris Interactive asked participants to agree or disagree with statements, like “I have positive relationships with my family,” and “My work is frustrating.” The results showed that not only are only a third of Americans “very happy,” but these Americans were more likely to be women and over the age of 50. Which, it turns out, is consistent with prior research, says Elizabeth Lombardo, PhD, author of A Happy You: Your Ultimate Prescription To Happiness. “When women get older, they realize that being perfect on the outside isn’t going to make them happy on the inside. They become resilient and realize that, unlike when they were young, not everything is the end of the world,” she says. But while older women may be happier, not everyone can say the same. Since a majority of participants were not “very happy,” we asked Dr. Lombardo to turn some of the negative statements in the Harris poll on their head. Here’s how to change your perspective: “I frequently worry about my financial situation.” Turn It Around: “There’s a difference between trying to take steps to make things better and just worrying about the future,” says Lombardo. “It’s like putting a winter coat on in the summer. Sure, the temperatures could drop later, but it’s not happening right now. People should be extra careful to focus on what they can do in the present, not worrying about what may not even happen.” Rethinking your grocery shopping and health care are easy, stress-free places to start. “I won’t get much benefit from the things that I do anytime soon.” Turn It Around: “Take long term goals and break them into short term,” says Dr. Lombardo. “If I want to lose 100 pounds, I’m not going to celebrate when I finally lose but, instead, I’ll pat myself on the back each time I go to gym. We all can find meaning on a daily basis—we just have to search for it.” “I rarely engage in hobbies and past-times I enjoy.” Turn It Around: “Most of us wait until we’re retired to do that! But I encourage people to figure out hobbies they would like to do,” says Dr. Lombardo. “If they say, ‘I can’t quit my job and travel,’ I ask, ‘Can you start reading books about travel?’ Prioritizing our hobbies makes us happy and less stressed. Just schedule it out, be it painting or a cooking class, like a meeting. And for as little as a half hour, allow yourself to do something fun.” (Forgot about fun? Check out 12 ways to reconnect with your carefree side.) “My work is frustrating.” Turn It Around: Practice the right happiness skills, like challenging yourselves to seek out the positive on a daily basis. “Happiness is a skill and when we learn the right skills, it’s literally impossible not to be happier,” says Dr. Lombardo. “The glass is half full—and it’s half empty. It’s just a matter of which you focus on.” More from Prevention: The Happiest People Are…
